Narcissism has plagued our society, and we normally see its effects through social media in the age of Instagram influencers.
That hit of dopamine feels so good, so let’s try and reenact that feeling with another post and another post; it’s a drug and I can’t stop.
But there is a different kind of narcissism that exists, and its lifeline is in virtue signaling by people who attempt to destroy other peoples careers.
Words are tricky, and to be honest as a writer I am nervous every time I publish anything because of this fact. I could say something with the best of intentions, but the people reading don’t always interpret what I’m saying the same way. And if you don’t like what I’m saying it can mean something worse to you.
My point is we have reached a point where we no longer forgive people for being human. If you haven’t said something mean, messed up or ‘problematic’ than congratulations you’re above and beyond everyone else around you.
Being offensive is easy because the line is subjective, everyone has a different perspective on when a joke goes too far.
Sometimes just a word can trigger someone and all of a sudden you are on the receiving end of internet hate.
I noticed it first hand when last year rapper Kendrick Lamar invited a girl on stage with him to sing along with one of his songs which featured the ‘N word’ in it several times. He stopped the song and scolded her for using the word that was placed into his song several times.
An argument broke out about white people singing along to songs to the ‘N word’.
An honest girl on my friend’s list admitted that she does the same thing, and wanted to strike a conversation with people about the word. She wanted to understand the problem with her using that word when listening to rap music.
A virtue-signaling mutual Facebook friend attacked her and tried to pin her down as a horrible person for trying to strike up a conversation about the use of the word. He claimed that because she is white she is not allowed to be in the conversation at all, and only black people can decide.
Ironically he’s white.
Both arguments have validity to them, but I’ve hung out with this virtue signaling monster before, and I heard him use the word several times.
The purpose of that story was to show that people act differently in the public eye, then they do behind closed doors. And when someone in the public eye messes up we shouldn’t be so quick to condemn that person as a bigot.
This kid may have sounded better on Facebook, but I know who he is and if he doesn’t want to admit it than he doesn’t want to accept his humanity.
I’ve been a hypocrite before, so I understand him.
My goal isn’t to try and destroy someone’s career for something they said even if it’s disgustingly wrong, a better solution in my mind is to try and understand the full context of who that person is because everyone has said something clumsy.
If that person has a history of saying racist or sexist things in a malicious way than I’ll condemn that person.
On a side note, I will always give a pass for comedians. There is a difference between saying something offensive in the context of trying to make others laugh and having malicious intent.
I’ve said some messed up things in my life. A lot of it I regret saying. Looking back at the age of 23 I’m embarrassed for being so dumb with my speech over and over.
The truth is I am just like you. I am human, and I deserve forgiveness for being human, and so do you.